A Three Dog Life

Time to say good-bye to the old … to unbelievable economic losses – (I have one friend who lost 40% of his retirement.  We all lost more than we’ll probably ever recover.)… to a grueling political battle… to little Cayley Anthony… and to some wonderful people like Paul Newman, George Carlin and Isaac Hayes.

Oprah lost her throne in ‘08…she’s now third on the list of America’s most powerful women, following Angelina Jolie and Sarah Palin.  (No, I’m not making that up.  Hillary Clinton is fourth, Tina Fey sixth, and Michelle Obama seventh.)

Michael Phelps became a legend, Miley Cyrus grew up, and a man gave birth. 

Displaying that lifelong talent for perfect timing, I quit my job just before the market crashed.  Now I’m going to have to go back to work instead of spending my days reading novels and eating diet-bon-bons.  Such is life.

What do you suppose the new year will bring?  Here are my predictions:

The world will become obsessed with Michelle Obama, and she’ll replace Jolie as the most powerful woman.

Stephen King will write another bad book.  (I wish he’d go back to drinking.  His work was so much better then.)

THERE WILL BE NO NEW ANIMALS ADDED TO MY FAMILY!

The economy will level out…no more dips and dives, just a long, slow stagnant period of recession while we watch to see what the new administration is going to do for us.  (Ah, but what do I know? )

One of my sons will think about getting married…and then decide not to.

We’ll stop caring so much about what the hell Brittany Spears is doing.  (She was number one in ‘08 internet searches, while Obama was third.)

There ya’ go.  My psychic powers are exhausted. 

Make wise choices tonight, friends.  Drink just enough so that you won’t notice poor old Dick Clark’s struggle with speech.

Peace and prosperity to all!

PJ

Too much of a good thing?  I never thought that was possible…except, of course, for food.  But today, friends, I have to admit that I have too many animals.  Love them all…would never part with any of them.  But seriously, what was I thinking? 

Hairballs, broken ornaments, piles of soft poop, (don’t mind the hard ones), incessant barking, blah blah and on and on.  This morning I got up to find a pile in the living room, my favorite gold angel on the floor, and my new Ipod ear buds destroyed. 

Yes, I’m feeling fairly pissy today. 

But here’s what I think…well, dream of anyway.  Things will be fine in 2009!

I love new beginnings, don’t you?  I WILL find that  new job.  I WILL lose those last 20 pounds.  I WILL quit smoking.  The kitten will grow up and stop causing household chaos.  The stock market will make me rich.  Older son will finish that degree.  Younger son will get a teaching job here in Ohio. I’ll learn to line dance.  And the man of my dreams will come waltzing up to my front door.

Hah!  Don’t wake me…it’s a good dream.

Christmas was wonderful, by the way.  Many parties, laughter, good food, and time spent with favorite people.  And only two bouts of the ‘bad bandies’….i.e., getting food stuck in my tiny stomach hole.  Both times were due to drinking while eating.  I really should learn to listen to the experts.

Tomorrow I’ll celebrate New Year’s Eve by drinking a toast to all of you.  I’ll wish you good health, good fortune, plenty of laughter and loads of love…or sex -  whichever you prefer. 

I am so blessed to have you all in my cyber-life.

Peace,

PJ