As I understand it, Memorial Day is set aside for the purpose of remembering our fallen heroes, as well as our deceased loved ones. That’s all well and good…but it recently occurred to me that there are other things in life that deserve memorials. Pets? Certainly. Friends who kicked you to the curb for some reason or other? Possibly. Favorite pairs of shoes? Sure, if you’re into that kind of thing.
Today, I want to remember all the cars of my lifetime. My first husband was/is a master mechanic, and it was he who taught me to appreciate, and… to a certain degree…understand, cars. (He also taught me how to drive standard…at the cost of a couple of poor clutches.)
My first car had belonged to my father. It was a 1958 blue Chevy with the biggest, hardest-to-turn steering wheel I’ve ever encountered. But great for having sex in the back seat! I wrecked that car one day by rear-ending the person in front of me. My sweet car was hauled to the junkyard and compacted into a square of multi-colored metal. I wanted to bring it home and use it as a coffee table. Hubby refused.
I then had a series of Volkswagons as a result of my husband’s job at the local VW dealership. An orange Super Beetle; a lime green Karmann Ghia with a black vinyl top and dual exhausts, thank you very much! (Felt like a little sex kitten in that car, I did.)
Oh, and somewhere in there were the two Plymouth Barracuda’s that my hubby bought. One – the ‘67 – was all fitted out for drag-racing. In that one I learned how to power-shift…a trick that astonished my sons and their friends years later. I also raced one of those ‘Cuda’s at Dragway 42 near here. And I won!!! Well, only because I fish-tailed going off the line and scared the bejesus out of the guy in the other lane – but a trophy is still a trophy, yes?
Let’s see, there was a VW bus – the kind that hippies loved to drive. The heater was lousy, but it was very comfy on trips. Fords, Pontiacs, (they had the best-sounding radios back then), a huge purple Oldsmobile.
I also had a few “beaters” in the mix: an old Karmann Ghia whose doors wouldn’t stay shut going around corners. We had an artist friend paint cartoons all over it, and peace symbols, with “Make Love Not War” on the dash. Used to ride around in that with my St. Bernard, Windsor.
One of my favorites was the first brand-new car I ever bought on my own…a 1986 Dodge Charger 2+2. What a ride!!!! I always got flirted with in that baby. Black, with a louvered rear window thingie, and five on the floor. I was so hot! (Literally, because it didn’t have air-conditioning.)
Then, when on my own after the second divorce, I went back to VW’s. A used Golf that was, honest to God, the worst car I’ve ever owned. Everything that could break in a car broke on that lemon. Then two Jetta’s, and finally…thanks to a couple of nice raises…a beautiful, loaded Passat.
And now I’m driving a Mazda Tribute…beautiful coppery-orange color with the words “Zoom-Zoom” on the rear window. The salesman, seeing that I was well past my prime, offered to have those words removed. I told him I wouldn’t buy the damn car if he took the sticker off. I may be old, but I can certainly still ZOOM! (Especially on back roads. I’ve been known to pass 5 or 6 cars in one push when in a hurry.)
I love cars. Love to think about what I’m going to buy next. I’ve always wanted a convertible, but now that I wear wigs most of the time, I’m not sure that’s a good idea.
Here’s to all the cars that got me through all the days and experiences of my life. I loved you all…well, except for you, Loser Golf. Thanks for getting me there safely.
Happy Memorial Day, and Peace to you all!
P
